Day 3 Update

We thought today's call with our update would never come.  Our other two calls always came first thing in the morning, so by the time 12pm rolled around without a phone call I was worried they had forgotten about us.  J convinced me to call the clinic, so I did and left my name with the answering service.  Finally around 1pm, my phone range and I found an SRM nurse on the other end.  PHEW!

Our Good Reports Continue!

ALL SIX EMBRYOS ARE STILL GROWING!

Oh. My. Goodness.  Our little ones are quite the fighters.

Further stats on them....

...one embryo is at 10 cells, one is at 9 cells, two are at 8 cells and two are at 6 cells.

I am truly amazed by their strength.
I just cannot believe how blessed we are to be having such amazing updates.

 Monday we will get our final report on how many made it through

genetic testing and to freeze.

There is a chance a few may need an extra day, making Tuesday their testing/freeze day.

Praying, thinking happy thoughts and keeping our fingers crossed!

Hopefully one of them will bring us Baby Vincent.

Day 2 Update

I was out on my walk/meditation this morning when my nurse called.  It was a short and sweet conversation.  She got right to business and let me know how things are going with our little ones.  

She said ALL SIX are still growing!

Of the six, FIVE are rated as "GOOD" and ONE is rated as "FAIR."

That is fantastic!

She further broke it down and said that the one that is rated as "fair" is still at two cells.  

While it is still right on track for the daily growth expectancy, it may end up that this little one needs an extra day to grow.

Two of the embryos rated as "good" are at four cells.

This is perfect and a little a head of the game for todays expected growth.

YAY!

And the remaining three "good" embryos are super stars and are already at eight cells!

UNBELIEVABLE!
I am beyond thrilled to hear such amazing news.

I can't wait to hear how are little ones are doing tomorrow.

Day 1 Update

At 9:13am this morning my phone rang, indicating a call from SRM.  My stomach did a flip-flop, my heart skipped a beat and my breath ceased.  I knew what this call was; my nurse was calling with a status report on our little eggs.  This moment has been weighing heavily on my mind since the minute I woke up from the retrieval yesterday.  Statistics show, and even the RE confirmed it yesterday, that we should expect 40-50% to pass the first step.  With only getting 6 eggs at retrieval, this would immediately cut it down to only 3.  And then it's expected that not all will make it to Day 5.  And even further than that, PGS illuminates the bad or unheatlhy embryos.  With all this in mind, we are praying to have at least one embryo to transfer in the coming months.

I answered my phone and sure enough, it was my nurse on the other end.  She did a quick check on how I was doing and if I needed anything from Dr. Kennedy.  Then she started in with our daily update.

Of the SIX eggs collected....all SIX were healthy, mature eggs.

YAY!!

All SIX of the mature eggs received ICSI....and ALL SIX FERTILIZED!!!!

Oh! My! Goodness!

I immediately began crying tears of joy.  I just couldn't believe it.  I had to write it down, otherwise I would have thought I was dreaming.  I immediately called J.  Upon hearing me hysterical on the phone, he was certain I was about to tell him horrible news.  After I told him about our little miracle, we were both left speechless.  And honestly, we still are speechless many hours later.

I truly believe we experienced a miracle thanks to so many people praying, thinking happy thought and keeping their fingers crossed for us.  Even the nurse said this kind of thing doesn't usually happen and was amazed.  While this was a major milestone, we still have many ahead of us in the next week.  We need continued thoughts and prayers to keep our little ones healthy and strong.  Day 5 (Monday) seems so far away and I hope and pray with all my might that we will beat the odds.

Retrieval In's & Out's

Many of you are are wanting to know how this all works. So let's start with the egg retrieval.

Once the RE (Reporoductive Endocrinologist) determines that it is time for retrieval, a trigger shot must be given.  This is usually hGC, but it can be a few other hormones that are able to get the eggs ready to be retrieved from the follicles.  The shot and retrieval are very time sensitive. Generally the shot is given 36 hours before the retrieval is scheduled to be done.  Wavering even just an hour can cause poor results at the time of retrieval.  

Egg Retrieval (ER) is done under a very low dose of general anesthesia, also known as "twilight sleep."  The picture below shows how the retrieval is done.  An ultrasound probe with a hollow needle goes through the wall of the vagina.  With the use of ultrasound, the RE probes the needle into each follicle individually, aspirating the contents into individual collection tubes, which is then passed off to the embryologist who searches for an egg within the fluid.  The whole process only take 15-25 minutes.

Here I am with fingers crossed before going into the retrieval.

Before I knew it, I was waking up in the recovery room.  The first thing out of my mouth was, "that was the best nap EVER."  LOL.  And then I found out how many eggs were collected.  With a huge sign of relief, I hugged my hubby with tears of joy running down my face.  Six isn't the best, but it's better the 4...and it only takes ONE to make Baby Vincent.

So now what?  Well the first few hours after retrieval, the egg and the sperm spend a little time getting all spiffed up.  Everything has to be perfect for their "first date."  There are two options for this "meeting."  The egg can be put into culture along with about a million little sperm, hoping for fertilization to happen "naturally"  OR...one super awesome sperm can be hand selected and directly inserted into the egg, increasing the chances of fertilization.  This process of fertilization is known as ICSI.  Since we had so few eggs retrieved, we decided to increase our chances and used ICSI to fertilize our eggs.

The picture below helps depict the stages of growth of our little ones.  Yesterday was considered Day 0.  Hopefully today we get word that some have fertilized and look like the blast in d1.  Some will grow faster then normal and some may need a day to catch up.  But in the end, we need as many of them as possible to look like the blast in d5.  The red arrow is the area from where the sample for genetic testing will be collected.  This part of the blast will eventually develop into the placenta.  The blue arrow is pointing to a collection of cells that will eventually become the baby.  :)

After the sample for genetic testing is collected, the embryos are then frozen on that same day, Day 5 (or Day 6 for the slower ones).  The results to the testing will then take 5-7 days to get back.  I will post more about PGS/PGD on a later date. 

I hope this helps.  :)

A Brand New Day

As you can all about imagine, I did not sleep very well last night.

When our alarm finally went off this morning, I had just finally fallen back to sleep...go figure!

So I laid there until J was all done getting ready for work and finally decided it was my turn to face the day.  While I was anxious to get to my doctors appointment, I was also very nervous for what she may say.

I arrived at my appointment and was soon led to a room way in the back of the office. 

Ugh! This can't be good.

I was then told that my doctor was going to be doing my scan herself.

Oh, thank heavens.

When she walked into the room she kindly said, "I read the report from yesterday, but let's not say anything until after I get a look at what's going on with your ovaries."

Sounds good to me.

I lay there in silence as she thoroughly looked upon the screen,
rhythmically tapping at buttons.

Having a background in medicine, I could get a good idea of what I was
seeing on ultrasound images up on the screen. 

But I had lost track of how many follicles she was measuring.

Then the button clicking stopped and she looked at me, smiled and said,

"Are you ready?"

Ummmm...yes, but no.

She started counting out loud as she scrolled through the follicles she had just measured.

When she got to the finally number, I started crying and wanted to jump up and hug her.

That magic number that was music to my ears was 7-8 "good sized" follicles.

<<BIGGEST EXHALE IN THE HISTORY OF MAN>>

**pic below is a list of all the follicles with their average sizes circles**

While of course this is better then the news I got yesterday from the oncall RE,

I discussed with her what happened with this cycle

and what we would do differently if we have to do a second IVF cycle.

I discussed with her our "Plan B" option, and was happy to hear that

she completely agreed with our plan.

Having this backup plan takes the pressure off whatever happens come

egg retrieval time.

And when will that be, you may ask?

Well, I got a call about 2 hrs ago from my nurse coordinator

who told me my estrogen level this morning was 700, but should be well over

1000 come retrieval time...

....which will be Wednesday morning at 10:15am.

 I give myself a trigger shot tonight (10,000u of hCG) at exactly 10:15pm.

This is essentially the equivalent to hitting the GO button.

Retrieval needs to be exactly 36 hrs later, if it's delayed even an hour or two

I would ovulate on my own and all of the follicles would be

empty and no eggs would be retrieved.

Crazy, huh?!

While I am ready for retrieval, I also wish I could hold on to my little eggs

for another day to make sure they ready to go make Baby Vincent.  :)

Where Do I Start...

Crushed....defeated...sad....heart-broken
All emotions I am trying to push away so that I can still have HOPE.
Hope that this first IVF cycle will not be cancelled.

I had my Day 8 Ultrasound and Estrogen level this morning.  It was down in Seattle with a doctor I have never seen before, nor is she truly aware of my situation.  I was just a patient number on her long list that needed to be checked off today.

As she started my ultrasound she first went to the right ovary.  The large follicle that I had on Thursday (which was 14mm then) was measured at 18mm.  And she passed over the other two on that ovary, stating they were just too small.
Hhhmmmm...ok....but I can see them!!!!
On the left ovary she measured 4 follicles ranging from 14-16mm and then a few others that were around 7-9mm.  Without skipping a beat she started discussing our options, with the first one out of her mouth being to cancel this cycle and just try naturally this month because even though my LEFT tube is blocked, crazier things have happened.

WTF!!!! WHATEVER!

Second option would be to go forth with this cycle in hopes of getting at least one egg to fertilize and then we would immediately transfer back that embryo on this cycle.  Third option would be to again continue to retrieval, freeze any embryos that make it to day five and then do another round of IVF injections in a few months...then we would combine the two cycles and send any samples on for genetic testing.

Well...you can about imagine what this crazy, emotional lady did...

...I started bawling my eyes out.
Canceling this cycle would pretty much mean that we are throwing away all the thousands of dollars we've spent on the meds alone.  We've tried naturally for 18 months....that obviously isn't working or we wouldn't have had to do IVF in the first place.  I've heard other women on a few IVF forums that I'm on discuss that their doc has mentioned this to them as well.  And the reason they gave that this option is even pushed is because clinics don't like to retrieve if there is less then 8 large follicles so that it doesn't effect their statistics if it doesn't turn out for the best.
Well, guess what?
I don't give a SH*T about their statistics!!!

I understand that she thinks we should trigger because of the large 18mm follicle on the right and that in a few days it will probably be "old" and not have a good egg in it anymore.  But I would much rather let that one get old and do a few more days of stim meds in the hopes that the others will grow more and maybe even give the smaller ones a fighting chance at having a mature egg as well.

Since getting home from our appointment, J and I have been talking...a lot.  And we have decided that we are definitely going to go through with the harvest with this cycle and are then leaning towards option 3...combining 2 cycles into one for PGS.  This will definitely take longer then we would have liked; adding 2-4 months on to the schedule we already have, but if that's what it takes then we are fine with that backup plan.

Oh and I aslo received the call with my estrogen level.  It was only 524.  Typical rule of thumb is that it is 200 "pts" for every mature egg.  Yet another indicator that I need to continue on stim injections for a few more days.  In just 2 days this number would very likely double.
Fingers crossed!

For now I am filing todays appointment as "WTF" and doing my best to put it out of my mind and stay hopeful. I see my regular RE first thing in the morning, and am anxious to see what she has to say.

So if you are reading this, I would truly appreciate an extra prayer or happy thought being sent our way.  I could really use some good Karma right now.

TGIF

So far on hormone injections, I've only had one "CRAZY" moment, but it was

Justified (ohhh...I love that show!  Anyone else watch it?)

Anyway....my nurse coordinator was supposed to call me yesterday

afternoon with the new game plan following my ultrasound and blood work appointment.

Well, after not hearing from her, I finally called the clinic at 10 minutes to 5pm.

The receptionist informed me that she had already gone home for the day and asked

if I wanted her voicemail and the nurse would answer it first thing in the morning.

You are kidding me right?

Is this lady brand new to the IVF world?

I told her, that tomorrow morning would be too late as I needed to know

what to do for the injection I had at 8pm.  She just couldn't get it through her head

what needed to happen and kept wanting to send me to the nurses voicemail.

I have to admit....I lost my sh*t!

Finally, she figured out what I needed and put me in contact with

the nurse coordinator that was on-call.

AHHHHHHHH!

And I am so very glad that I did call, because my RE wanted me to start the

antagonist injection as well as increase one of the simulation meds.

This is will help slow the larger follicles down and prevent them from

early ovulation, while allowing the smaller follicles to catch up in size.

So I know have THREE injections each night.

The nurse did say that I am responding to the meds very well

and will likely have the retrieval earlier then expected. 

So like I said, that was my only crazy moment I've had since starting injections.

Most of the time my mood is on the lower part of the mood swing.

I feel like I could cry over spilled milk.  Pretty much anything can set me off.

My head is playing mind games with me since yesterdays ultrasound.
I have so many questions rolling around in there...

I had 22 follicles two months ago, why do I only have 15 this month?

What if the big, lead follicle doesn't slow down and I have to do the harvest early?

What if we only get 5 eggs?  From that, percentage shows that I many only have

2 or 3 "good eggs."

We've spent all this money only to have it all fail. :(

I just need to keep faith that it's all going to work out and that it's ok

if it doesn't happen as I picture it in my head.

It only takes one healthy, strong egg to make a miracle baby.

 My acupuncture therapist did a good job of bringing me back to center,

not only with what she told me but also with this mornings session.

She said that amazing things happen between day 5 US and day 8 US.

She doesn't doubt that those little ones will catch up in size.

I have to keep hope that what she says is true since she sees

this stuff ALL THE TIME.

As for my acupuncture session..it was another amazing experience.

I, again, was able to get into a deep relaxation even though

I had a bit of a headache, but I had one

needle that was VERY achy today.

It was the pin that she placed between my eyes.

After the session was over and she was pulling all the needles out, I told

her about this pesky pin and she laughed.

She then told me that this pin is known as the "Third Eye" or the "All Seeing Eye'

in Chinese Medicine and it is known to regulate hormones.

AHHHHH!  Hello?  Are you flipping kidding me?

Post session, I feel amazing!

Both the headache and hormonal swings are under control.

This stuff is seriously mind-blowing.

 Next up....Ultrasound and Blood work Sunday morning.

IVF Injection Days 2-5

Sorry I haven't been updating as much as I had hoped.

These meds are really throwing me for a loop.

I was really nauseous at the beginning and am VERY tired and bloated!

Monday night I insisted that J gave me at least one of the injections.

Knowing how squeamish he is around anything medical, I knew I was in for a real treat.

I had him give me the easiest of the two...Folistim.  It's in a handy dandy pen,

and all you do is push down on the top.  After he was all done, he was sweating

bullets and had to sit down before he passed out.

No Joke!

Guess we'll have to work on that a little more.

ha ha ha

I had my first appointment at my Reprodcutive Endocrinologist (ER) Tuesday morning.

It was just for blood work.  I got a call later in the day that it was a good level for

where I was in the cycle and to continue what I was doing.  I also had an Acupuncture

appointment later that morning.  I told her about my nausea and fatigue and

she said that my chi was "rebelling" because it was revved up a little too much.

And as for the fatigue, well she said that I am essentially "running a genetic marathon

by asking my body to produce a years worth of eggs all in one month,"

so being tired is expected.  But anyway, she geared my treatment towards calming

my chi down in hopes of getting rid of the nausea.

The session felt AMAZING.

I was able to really get into a deep relaxation and felt refreshed when it was over.

I was also truly amazed that when I rose my nausea was completely GONE...
and has stayed away ever since!

WOW!

Injections that night were easy peasy!

Day 4 (Wednesday) was a much better day.  My nausea was gone.

I managed to get a little bit of the bloating down by drinking Powerade.

I did some editing and rested.

We now have cable again after going the past 2 yrs without,

so I have been busy finding movies on HBO, Showtime, ect to DVR and watch during the day.

It's the little things that bring me joy.  :)

This morning was my Day 5 appointment with my RE.  I had an Ultrasound and blood work.

I will not get my estrogen level back until this afternoon,

but I did manage to get pics of my ovaries from the ultrasound.

 I have put an arrow next to the big black blob things, also known as follicles.

Hopefully within each of these is a cute little egg that will be mature by next weeks harvest.

Some now for some stats...

I have 15 follicles total!!  WOO HOO!!

My right ovary has 5 follicles, measuring 14mm, two at 7mm and two at 4mm.

My left ovary has 10 follicles, measuring two at 11.5mm, two at 10.5 mm and the

rest are between 4-7 mm.

To put this into size reference; the bigger ones are the size of a blueberry,

while the littler ones are the size of a pea.

No wonder I feel like an overstuffed sausage!
In the end, my RE would like to have multiple follicles,
upwards of 10-15 follicles, over 18mm before going in to harvest.
PS...18mm is about the size of a grape.
So by the time next week rolls around, I will essentially have
clusters of 5 & 10 grapes inside my lower abdomen.
Fantastic!

Well it's been a long day and I am exhausted.

Time for pajama pants, warm tea and a good movie.

Ready...Set....GO!

First IVF Injection is DONE!

It was pretty smooth sailing except that the Menopur felt like

glass shards as I pushed it in.

I've been told it's best to ice the area before administering this injection,

so I'll be sure to do that for the rest of them.

I don't know if it is the meds....or the menstrual cramps...or 

the CrAzY, busy, Active, FUN weekend we just had,

but I am feeling like complete crap today.  I'm doing my best to get my 2-liters

of water down along with eating a high protein and dairy diet,

but it's not going very well.  Hopefully tomorrow is better and I can play

catch-up a little bit.

I have a blood draw at my doctors office tomorrow morning,

followed by an acupuncture appointment. YAY!

I promise I will write more tomorrow and will also put up a post

explaining more in detail as to what the meds are doing.

Red Light......GREEN LIGHT!!!

So a little recap on the events so far this week.

My second acupuncture session on Tuesday went really well.  She geared the

pins towards the more "reving up" meridians.

And boy did they work!

I have been feeling nauseous and had abdominal cramps for the past

few days as I gear up for AF and get ready to start IVF.

I seriously LOVE acupuncture!

Tuesday night I didn't sleep well, as my mind was racing with wonder before

my baseline ultrasound I had the next morning.

I got to the appointment a little before 8 and got right in.

As the ultrasound began, the tech checked out my right ovary first.

This is the one that has given me SO MANY problems

and the one that I was worried about most for having a cyst.

The tech announced "NO CYSTS and SIX follicles!"

Holy moly, I was ecstatic!

Moving over to the left ovary now.

"There's a small, deflating cyst."

Good feeling...gone.  :(

What the heck!?  How could my body betray me like this?
I did however have 17-18 follicles...so that's good.

The tech was hopeful though since it appeared to be deflating, but I still

had blood drawn to find out what my Estrogen level was.

If the cyst was producing Estrogen, then my level would be above 50 and it would

not be safe to start our IVF schedule.  We would have to wait 4-5 days

and check Estrogen levels again.

So great!  I had a day filled with uncertainty and worrying.

Finally around 3:30pm my doctors nurse called.

47.9!!!!!

Woo hoo!  Phew!  Nothing like cutting it close.  :)
We got the green light from the doc to continue on our

IVF schedule as planned.

This morning I took my last ever birth control pill...

...and it felt great!

I even did a little happy dance after it was down.

 he he he

Our dearest friends from Nebraska fly in today to take in the Seattle

life for a few days.  I cannot wait to have fun and not think about

all this for a few days.  Plus it will help the next 3 days before I start

injections go by sooo much faster.

It's about to get real.

Busy Week

I am so glad that our schedule is going to be a super busy one this week.

These final days before we start injections are going to fly by...thankfully!

TODAY I am busy editing away.

TUESDAY I have my second acupuncture appointment, which I am soooo excited for!

WEDNESDAY I have a suppression ultrasound to make sure I do not have

any cysts on my ovaries.

THURSDAY I take my last birth control pill AND our bestest friends from

Nebraska fly in for a fun filled weekend.

FRIDAY we are spending the day in the Big City of Seattle.

SATURDAY is more site seeing.

SUNDAY is more site seeing with our friends

and then that evening will be my first dose of Menopur and Follistim.

YAY!

I can't believe it's finally here.

When I turned the page in my planner this morning, I literally squealed when

I saw what was written on Sunday night.  eeeeep!